Capture Your Grief Day 2: Heart

"i carry your heart ( I carry it in my heart)"
-E.E. Cummings

Peyton Grace McFadin 

Born into our Heavenly Fathers arms 

December 12, 2011 at 4:44pm. 

She was a tiny little thing, only weighing 4lbs 14oz. 

She had brown curly hair, and a cute button nose. 

Long fingers and toes.

The prettiest pink lips I've ever seen. 

She was beautiful and she was ours.

I experienced the most joyous love and intense heartache I will ever have, all in the same moment.

Time stood still.

Our first born and only daughter. 

We never got to see her take her first breath, or first steps.

None of the hopes and dreams we had for her will ever come true. 

But Peyton lives on in my heart. 

She is kept safe there.

I carry her through life 

and I've learned to be her mother from Earth while she resides in Heaven. 

It's a strange blessing to know the pain of such a loss.

You look at the world differently and for that I am thankful for my daughter. 

I'll continue to carry Peyton in my heart for as long as I'm breathing...
and I hold on to God's promise that one day I will see her again.